6 Best Queer Speed Dating Events From Around the World

  • October 22, 2024

Meeting people in real life is hard - but meeting people on the apps can be even harder. Dating app usage is on the decline, and even apps previously known for being queer-friendly - like Feeld and OKCupid - aren’t what they used to be. More and more people are looking for ways to meet each other offline, and LGBTQ+ speed dating events are popping up all around the world.

If you’ve never been a speed dating event before, how do you know where to start? We checked out the latest queer-friendly speed dating events from Portland, OR, to Melbourne, Australia to help you out.

Whether you’re queer, kinky, non-monogamous, or just looking for friends, these queer speed dating events offer something for everyone. Here are our top picks:

Luvvly

Luvvly is a great starting point for people who want to meet each other in real-life, but don’t want to ditch their phones entirely. Instead of an in-person host, you’ll get notifications on your phone telling you who to chat with next. For example, your next date might be with “Jordan,” who has “long brown hair, glasses, an orange shirt, and a bicycle helmet.” You’ll also get a question or prompt for your ~8-minute date.

Luvvly is available in half-a-dozen cities, with a packed calendar catering to straight people, queer men, queer women, and bisexual/pansexual people. Some events have a theme, such as “professional career” or “active/healthy lifestyle,” while others are focused on platonic friending, such as “Girls Night”.

Each event has an age range (i.e., 25-35 or 35-45), with some flexibility at either end, and is typically held at a bar or coffeeshop. Your contact details will only be shared if there’s a mutual match.

Luvvly’s identity guidelines are fairly inclusive: event their “straight” events aren’t strictly for heterosexual people. I had a good time at both their Queer Men and Straight events, although I did occasionally have to correct people’s assumptions about my orientation. If you’re looking to date queer people of any gender, check out their Bisexual or Pansexual events, in which everyone is paired with everyone.

Available in:

  • Seattle, WA
  • Portland, OR
  • San Francisco, CA
  • New York, NY
  • Austin, TX
  • Denver, CO

Pricing: ~$25 USD

Shuffle Dating

Shuffle Dating is nearly identical to Luvvly: there’s no in-person host, so you’ll receive instructions through your phone. You’ll find your date at the venue, get a prompt, and chat for around 10 minutes. The whole event takes around two hours and you’ll get a follow-up text the next day with any matches.

Shuffle Dating is currently available in 15 cities around the U.S., including Austin, Portland, and San Francisco, with events for Men & Women, Queer Women, and Queer Men. Like Luvvly, each event has an age range, and some have themes like “Don’t have kids and not open to kids.” When I went to their Bisexual speed dating event in Portland, I met around 10 people of various genders and orientations.

If you’re on the fence about going, keep in mind there’s a strict no-show policy and you’re expected to stay for the entire event to ensure there are enough dates for everyone.

Available in:

  • Atlanta, GA
  • Austin, TX
  • Boston, MA
  • Chicago, IL
  • Denver, CO
  • Las Vegas, NV
  • Los Angeles, CA
  • Minneapolis, MN
  • Nashville, TN
  • New York City
  • Philadelphia, PA
  • Phoenix, AZ
  • Portland, OR
  • San Diego, CA
  • San Francisco, CA
  • Seattle, WA
  • Washington, D.C.

Pricing: ~$25 USD

Dear Pluto

Dear Pluto is a speed dating event hosted in Sydney and Melbourne, Australia, and Berlin, Germany. Unlike Shuffle Dating and Luvvly, Dear Pluto uses a more traditional format: for each round, you’ll rotate around the room to a numbered table, and write down the name of your date on a printed match card that you’ll turn in later. If both dates circle “Yes,” you’ll get a follow-up email with your contact details.

Dear Pluto hosts “Str8” Speed Dating and Queer Speed Dating. Str8 events are for “men/women” pairings, but are open to all genders, and they “recommend offering your pronouns if they differ from he/him or she/her.” Solo tickets are limited, so you’re encouraged to book with a friend of a different gender or get on the waitlist.

Their queer events don’t have gender categories, so everyone is paired up with everyone. My partner and I went to one of their queer events in Melbourne and we each went on around a dozen 5-minute dates. There was an in-person host who welcomed us to the venue, and gave us sticky notes to write down our names, pronouns, and other useful information (such as bisexual or non-monogamous).

Compared to the no-host events I went to in Portland, it was nice to have a facilitator set the tone - and even perform a drag show during intermission! - although the live DJ was a little loud at times. Dear Pluto doesn’t have a specific age policy, but caters to people in their 20s and 30s.

Available in:

  • Melbourne, Australia
  • Sydney, Australia
  • Berlin, Germany

Pricing: $0-30 AUD

Hot Potato Hearts

Hot Potato Hearts is only available in Chicago, but what it lacks for in geography, it makes up for with variety! In addition to its all-gender speed dating events, it also hosts community-specific events, including 40+ speed dating, POC speed dating, sober speed dating, and mask-required speed dating.

Hot Potato Hearts was launched in 2021 by Katie and Julie, and has been featured in TimeOut, the Chicago Reader, and Eater Chicago. Like Dear Pluto, HPH uses nametags and dating cards rather than smartphone notifications. You’ll go on a series of 5-minute dates, and there’s no penalty for leaving early.

HPH is open to people who are either single or ethically non-monogamous. Although most participants are between the ages of 24 and 33, there’s no age requirement other than being 21+. Friendship matches are encouraged, but you’re expected to be open to both romance and friendship. According their FAQs, “If you want to friendzone someone, Katie will do that for you over email.”

Available in:

  • Chicago, IL

Pricing: $13.00 - $25.00 USD

We Met IRL

We Met IRL was founded by Maxine Williams in 2022, and hosts speed dating events for both straight and queer New Yorkers, with an “extra focus on POC and LGBTQ+ folk.”

We Met IRL is open to people between the ages of 25-35, and you’ll need to register in order to attend. You can choose from either a Straight or Queer intake form, which will ask for your name, gender, relationship preferences, and social media handle. You can sign up for both types of events if you’re bi or pan.

Currently, We Met IRL is only available in NYC, but you can fill out their city interest form to let them know where they should host their next event (and whether you want to be a co-cost or ambassador for it!).

Available in:

  • New York, NY

CERES Weed Dating

Not everyone wants to go speed dating in a bar or coffeeshop. The CERES Community Environment Park in Melbourne hosts a series of speed dating events for people who love plants. Instead of moving from table to table, you’ll be dating outdoors on an urban farm and literally pulling up weeds alongside your date.

I went to one of their evening events, which started off with drinks and a brief tour of the farm, and attracted a mix of outdoorsy types. Weed Dating is open to people all genders and sexualities. Specific events include Queer Weed Dating, 20s and 30s Weed Dating, and Over 40s Weed Dating.

Available in:

  • Melbourne, Australia

Pricing: $25-30 AUD

Photo credit: Norby Gyachung